I have been hung up on my friend for a very long time. He knows of my feelings for him, yet he also knows that we would never work out as a couple. I still hang out with him, and his friends, even though I know nothing will come out more than friendship. People think that I am settling with this guy, and that I need to move on.
At a recent meetup, eventually the topic shifted between dating and career. One girl mentioned how she really liked the guy, but ended ghosting her. She then started calling, texting, and messaging the guy, yet didn’t get a response. Another girl mentioned how she was calling and emailing job prospects, yet have been getting no response. Sound familiar?
It is really funny how jobs and significant others resemble each other, at least in our perspectives. We try to find the perfect match in either situation. However, in the end, we end up settling, because we do not think we deserve true happiness, or it is just to get by.
At least, I think that way. I’m not really sure about how others think. For the longest time, with both guys, and with my jobs, I was just settling. I felt lucky that someone was paying attention to me, that someone wanted me around. It didn’t matter if the relationship or the job was totally wrong for me. In the end, neither worked out for me.
Currently, I’m in a job that I love. I finally took stock of what I want in a position, and what I have to offer. I wanted a job that was challenging, that put my skills to use, had patient interaction, and have great relationships with physicians and nurses. I wanted to be more clinical, as well as working the operations. I am a preceptor, so I wanted to be able to teach pharmacy students and new pharmacists. I wasn’t picky about the working hours, about the location (well, I didn’t want to relocate), or really the field. In the end, I wound up being an oncology pharmacist in a clinic, with a unusual hybrid setting (clinic/infusion/retail). I gave up settling, and found my dream job.
Now, if only I can stop chasing after the wrong men? Dream man, come soon!!!